As a child, my parents often told me that I was not born with an instruction manual, and they were learning just as much about being a parent as I was learning about growing up. Just my luck being an oldest child, I suppose.

In a surprising turn of events, Maggie was born with a small owners manual, which I have decided to share with everyone.

Rest assured, this manual with its easy to follow diagrams has been a "must read" for both Emilie and myself, and is always in arms reach for those hard to answer questions we all have about newborn care. Why, not 10 minutes ago as I was updating our blog, I had an urgent question about how to check Maggies diaper, and was very relieved to see that I was going about it properly.

Baby names and fun with meconium

Emilie and I have been vacillating for months on what to call our little girl. We decided yesterday to name her Margaret Elisabeth Wilson. Margaret and Elisabeth are both family names that happen on both sides of the family at one point or another.
Matthew is learning that this little girl is not going away, and I'm not sure he's comfortable with the change. Since Emilie has been focused on Maggie, Matthew has been extremely clingy, much more so than normal and very tempermental. I can't really say I blame him at all. He's been the center of attention for 2 1/2 years now, and suddenly he's been relegated to second place. He is still a very eager helper, and loves to clamber up on the bed, the couch, wherever Mommy or Daddy is holding Maggie and ask to hold her, or shove her pacifier in her face, or give her hugs and kisses. I'd better enjoy it while it lasts, another year or two and I'm sure they'll be at each others throats...
Even though I've taken two weeks of leave to be at home with the family, I'm still not really at "home," I've got plenty of homework, school and work projects to keep me thoroughly occupied. I did spend several hours outside today watching Matthew run around the playground, while I attempted to do some math homework. Needless to say, I didn't get much done.
We are proud to announce thatMaggie has a very normal working digestive tract . She's reminded me of the enjoyment of meconium and it's tar-like qualities. Changing a girls' diaper is a bit different than changing a boys' diaper. 'Nuff said on that.
More on the birth experience: it was great. It was (for me at least) a very pleasant experience, and I got to help out more than I thought I would. Not medically, but emotionally and physically being there for Emilie. She's told me that my help was invaluable, and that my support has brought us closer together. There was nothing medical to do: No IV's; no monitoring devices taped, stapled, sutured or screwed into anyone or anything; no O2 masks, cannulas, etc to get in the way; it was a completely natural birth. Our midwife and doula even left just hours post partum after assuring that mother and baby were both stable and comfortable. I don't think I'd have done it any other way, and it will take some serious persuasion to convince me to participate in a stereotypical hospital birth next time.



Matthew snuggling with his new sister.

Since my Mother-in-Law can't wait any longer to see pictures

And it's only been 12 hours since the baby was born... patience, mother. Sheesh.

Anyway, as you can see below, we have now increased the size of our family by one (1) child, female, infant NSN 6515080789651. We haven't decided on a name yet. Emilie and I had several picked out before the birth, but we can't decide which to choose now that the girl is actually here.
Details: Born at 06/07/08 at 9:21am (I'm calling her our straight flush child - 6,7,8,9 ha ha, get it?) 8lbs 14 oz and almost 21 inches long. She has all 10 fingers, all 10 toes, and all the right parts in all the right places. Was an APGAR 9 and 10, and as of this very minute is sleeping peacefully on Mommy while Mommy reads a book to Matthew.
Matthew is enthralled with the child, and demands to hold her at every opportunity. I'm sure he will continue to be the eager helper, regardless of how much help we actually need. I don't know that it's quite sunk in yet that this new baby is his sister, and she won't be going anywhere anytime soon.
The birth experience was as good as I could possibly imagine it to be, but I won't share any details just yet (Emilie wants to tell it). Needless to say that I am very grateful to all involved that I got to help out in the small way I did. To all who read this, a doula can be an invaluable asset to your birth experiece, I highly recommend it.

Waiting

It is so hard not to be anxious. I am less than a week away, and even though I vowed to not get antsy, I am. Like I said in the last post, I am trying to stay busy, so I keep inventing projects. My current goal is 30 freezer meals. I have made 10 in the last two days. It is actually not that hard. It just means making a meal, doubling or tripling the recipe and freezing it in family size portions. So far I have made Pepperoncini Beef Sandwiches and Spaghetti. Tonight I plan to make chicken enchiladas, and if I can cajole Brian into running to the store, I will also do smoothies.

Yesterday Matt and I went to Heritage Park (This Is the Place State Park) with my friend Dawn and her two girls. Dawn and I are both due next week. We had a lot of fun watching the kids stamp leather, churn butter, and play with the baby animals. We both half-hoped that the walking would put us into labor, but no luck.

Today Matt and I took the train to the SLC main library. Matt wanted books on baby chicks. They are his new obsession after holding one yesterday at Heritage Park. In his box of stuffed animals that he has never played with we found a stuffed chick and duckling. They are his current favorite toys. I told him that chicks come out of eggs and he thinks that is really funny. (He just started using the word "funny" and so a lot of things are funny to him.) But he keeps referring to the chicks and eggs idea. He also told me this morning that chicks drink milk from mommy's breasts. I therefore thought it would be a good idea to start talking about the differences between birds and mammals. We got a couple of great books at the library: one does a good job of showing the life cycle of chickens, another that is from Dr. Seuss's learning library, discusses the characteristics of birds and another (also from Dr. Seuss's learning library) discusses the characteristics of mammals.

I was just introduced to Dr. Seuss's learning library. The books are really cute, because the actually teach about a subject, but they do it while rhyming and staying in a rhythm that appeals to kids. I think I will try to get a collection going, and then supplement them with non-fiction books with real photos.

For those of you that are interested here are a couple of titles from the Dr. Seuss Learning Library:

Is a Camel a Mammal? All About Mammals by Tish Rabe







Fine Feathered Friends: All About Birds by Tish Rabe







On Beyond Bugs! All About Insects by Tish Rabe








They also have books on space, the weather and other fun topics. These will definitely be keepers.

So Behind the Blog

I haven't posted in so long that I am getting overwhelmed with how much I have to post. Since this blog is my main journal, I don't feel like I can just skip things. So, in order to keep from being overwhelmed, I thought I would just start with one post and go back and add one or two at a time until I am caught up.

I am officially "legal" to have a baby, since I am now past 37 weeks and am therefore within the full term range. I have been telling myself all along that I will go to 40 weeks so that I don't get too anxious. However, yesterday, I started daydreaming about going into labor--I need to stop that or I will get anxious. This last few weeks of pregnancy is like the last few weeks of a mission. The missionary starts to get trunky, but he/she is trying so hard to not be trunky. On the mission, the best treatment for trunkiness was staying busy. Unfortunately (and fortunately) I am all ready for the baby. Friday I finished getting everything ready. Clothes and blankets are washed, the bassinet if set up and all of my labor accessories are ready to go. I even have to do lists made up for when labor starts (I promised Matthew we would eat cake when the baby comes out, so provided that I have enough time before I retire to Laborland, I am going to make a cake). The downside of all this preparation is that now I don't feel like I have anything to do except wait. And as Murphy's law dictates (or one of those silly laws that try to explain the idiosyncracies of the universe), if I wasn't prepared I would have this baby early, but since I am prepared, the baby will be late. I guess I will have to think up some new projects.

Of course, I can't complain. This has been a great pregnancy and I am feeling amazingly energetic for 37.5 weeks along. With the exception of a pubic bone that feels like it is going to split in half, frequent braxton-hicks contractions that make one side of my uterus puff out more than the other so that my abdomen looks like a deformed balloon, and the discomfort that comes from having an exceptionally short torso and a squirmy baby, I feel great. I am just so excited to meet this little person--our baby girl. I am going to be the mother of two. Wow!

New Words

So, here are a few of Matthew's new (and frequently used) words:

yeah
butterfly--pronounced "buttahby", ant
blanket--pronounced "bankibank"
movie--pronounced "moowee"
grandma--pronounce "mah-mahk"
help (always accompanied by the sign for help)
pancake, juice, almond, nut
spatula (more on this one later)
giraffe--pronounced "giratte"
backpack
bike
oval--pronounced "obal"
milk, apple
screw, tools
play, run, walk, drive
big/small
mean/nice
bowl, plate, spoon
my, mine, me
your
money
rock, tree
two, three (which sounds a lot like tree and must be interpreted in context)
mommy, daddy, baby
girl, boy

These, of course, are in addition to others that he has been using for awhile. Most of these he began using spontaneously without any prompting. Like butterfly: I put "Peter Pan" on two nights ago to see if he would be interested and when he saw Tinkerbell, he just blurted out butterfly (it sounded more like "buttahball"). Since that night he has probably said the word a hundred times.

He is definitely going through a vocabulary growth spurt, because he does not stop saying words. I don't think he is ever quiet, except when he is riding his bike outside or when he is asleep, and he only goes to sleep after talking to himself for 20 minutes (or more). In fact, he has talked in his sleep a couple of times in the last two or three weeks. By the way, this vocabulary growth spurt has been accompanied by a volume increase. He is loud!

Matthew's Language

So, after many months of wondering how such a verbose person as I could have a child that simply did not want to use words, my son has become a word fountain. His active vocabulary is increasing daily (I always knew he had the words in him, he just wasn't using them). The other day he came into my room in the morning and said, "Waffle." This was definitely his own initiative because we hadn't had waffles for weeks and he had never said the word before. Then, yesterday, he pointed at Brian's backpack and said "backpack."

He is now attempting short sentences. He uses all of the big words but doesn't use any fillers. A Matthew sentence might sound something like this, "Me p'ay Daddy 'side." Translated it means I played with Daddy outside. He also doesn't use "I" yet, but is adamant about identifying himself as "me."

Identifying "me" and "mine" is very important right now. In addition, Matthew classifies everything small, big and bigger as baby, mommy and daddy. For example, yesterday we went to IKEA and saw some baskets that came in a variety of sizes. He immediately pointed to the biggest and said, "daddy," the medium sized and said, "mommy," and the smallest and said, "baby." This classification seems to apply to all things of differing sizes: his elephants (of course), cups, screws and trucks.

There is definitely a lot going on his brain and I love watching his progress. I honestly feel at times that I can hear the cogs turning in his head. His brain is working so hard. I love it!

Doula Training

Last weekend I attended doula training. This was the first step to certifying as a doula and it succeeded in making me even more excited than I already was. The training was three days in which we learned how to support a woman and her partner in labor. We learned a lot about modern obstetrical practice and the risks and benefits of obstetrical intervention, as well as the many options for pain relief--both medical and natural. The natural methods we learned included comfort techniques like counter-pressure, massage, relaxation and position changes. Our training even included how to help women that have epidurals and cesarean sections. I really enjoyed learning how to give positive verbal, emotional and physical support during labor in order to help women feel good about their birth experiences.

The entire thing was a huge affirmation for me. I have become used to hearing so many negative stories about birth, that I had started to think that I was odd to have thought that Matthew's birth was an incredibly amazing and empowering experience. In fact, this training reminded me of why I chose a natural birth with Matthew. In the summer of 2005, I performed in a community theater production of "Oklahoma." During that time I made friends with a fellow castmember that happened to mention in one of our talks, that she had given birth at a birth center. I had already thought that I wanted an unmedicated birth, but Dawn was the first person I had ever talked to that was enthusiastic about her birth experience. In addition, she made me feel confident that although the birth process was hard work--I could do it. So, Dawn led me to the Birth and Family Place; to my midwife, Rebecca Williams; to the Bradley method and to a lot of independent research. The more I researched, the more I was convinced that, for me and my baby, natural birth with a midwife was the best choice. The one thing that made the biggest impression on me throughout the whole preparation was how positive my midwife, my Bradley teacher and others in the "gentle birth" model were about birth. When "gentle birthers" (I am calling them this for lack of a better word) talked about birth they were incredibly educated about the risks and benefits of obstetrical intervention, as well as the alternatives to unnecessary obstetrical intervention. Most importantly, these women were overwhelmingly positive about birth and women's ability to give birth naturally.

This was the beginning of my interest in the birth process, and the doula training solidified my understanding of the birth process. Once again, I was struck by how positive birth can be when the family and care providers are supportive of a woman's ability to give birth without unnecessary obstetrical intervention. (I say unnecessary obstetrical intervention because there are certainly times when OB technology is necessary and a blessing. For women, the difficulty is in becoming educated about what things are done because of obstetrical tradition, hospital policy or convenience and what is medically necessary and evidence based.) That is one of the many things that I am learning more about as a I train to be a doula.

The other thing I loved about the doula training was finding other women who felt the same way that I did about birth. Previously, when I talked to people about birth, I felt a little like I was in some kind of weird counter-culture. It was almost as if people thought I was crazy to give birth without an epidural and as if I was anti-medicine or anti-doctor in some way. (And those that know my whole birth story, realize that I am definitely not anti-medical. I am very grateful for modern medical technology.) However, at the training I met extremely educated, normal, professional women (not hippies) that had done the same research I had and had come to the same conclusions. It was great.

My favorite idea from the training came from Kristi Ridd-Young, ICCE, CD(DONA) and president of the Midwives College of Utah: Our job as doulas is to help every woman and her partner have a positive memory of birth.

I love that idea--a job where I, by the things I do and say, can help people have positive memories about one of the most amazing experiences life has to offer.

So, after this rather longwinded explanation of my weekend, I want to leave my favorite birth quote: "We have a secret in our culture. . .and it's not that birth is painful. It's that women are strong." - Laura Stavoe Harm

Qwui-Qwui

As I mentioned before, Matthew has started trying new words. Often, the result is more cute than accurate, but I am so excited that he is trying. About a week ago, he started saying binkie, but with his pronunciation it sounds more like qwui-qwui. The "q" is a very soft "q" and I loved hearing it.

However, even his recent ability to say binkie, did not deter my goal of getting rid of the binkie. As cute as Matthew is when he says binkie, I think that he is more cute when he does not have a pacifier permanently attached to his face.

So, starting last week I came up with an idea (giving credit for the seed of the idea to Super Nanny). I told Matthew that we were going to go to the zoo to give binkie to the baby animals. He nodded and smiled whenever I brought up the idea, so I figured that giving binkie to the animals might just work.

Finally, the big day came. Brian was home from work yesterday, so we made a big deal out of the anticipated trip to the zoo. When we mentioned goodbye to binkie, Matthew just nodded and smiled. Good sign. We got out a pretty pink box (fortunately Matthew isn't particular about boy and girl colors yet) and Matthew wrapped binkie in tissue paper and put it in the box. Then we taped the box closed, decorated it with Thomas stickers and left for the zoo. Matthew was so proud of his little box. He carried it to the car, insisted on carrying it on his lap in the car, and continued to hold onto it while we walked around the zoo. We figured that Matthew would want to give the binkie to the elephants, since they are his favorite animal, so Brian and Matthew headed to the elephant enclosure while I stopped at the gift shop. Then I caught up to the boys and asked Matthew if he wanted to give binkie to the elephants. He said no. Then I asked if he wanted to give it to the monkeys and he said no. At this point I started thinking that maybe the idea wasn't going to work after all. But then Matthew pointed straight ahead. At the far end of the sidewalk, I could see the zebra enclosure (he apparently remembered where the zebras were) and when Brian asked if he wanted to give the binkie to the zebras he nodded yes. Well, we hightailed it to the zebra exhibit before Matt could change his mind.

Brian helped Matthew set his little box on the ground, while I stayed about 20 feet behind to hide the gift shop purchase in a tree in front of the bear enclosure. Brian told Matthew to say goodbye to binkie one more time. Then he told Matt that the bears had left him a present because he was so nice for giving binkie to the zebras. Without any hesitation, Matthew said goodbye to binkie and went to look for his present.

I crept back to the pink box and threw it in the garbage--I was worried about causing a bomb scare if it was left out it in the open. I have to admit that I was a little emotional getting rid of the binkie. In many ways it represents his babyhood, which he is quickly leaving behind. My baby is definitely not a baby anymore.

Meanwhile, Matthew found the bear's present to him: a stuffed elephant. He was overjoyed at the elephant and hugged it over and over. After one night of sleep and two naps, I think I can say that the experiment worked. He has gone to sleep without binkie three times, and although he has asked where qwui-qwui is, he just nods and smiles when I tell him that the zebras at the zoo have it.

Of course, it is now impossible to separate him from his new elephant which he calls bee-bee. With this new addition, there are now six animals that must go to bed with him: stuffed elephant, mommy plastic elephant, baby plastic elephant, tiger, giraffe (which he pronounces giratte), and puppy.

I guess that the next step is potty-training. We bought a box of diapers at Costco, and have determined that this is our last box of actual diapers (well, at least until June). Matthew now tells me when he has gone or is going poo-poo, and his likes to sit on his potty, so I think he is in that "potty-training" window. I guess we will see how it goes.

Bedtime with Dad

Brian isn't usually home when Matthew goes to bed, so when he is home he tries to make the bedtime routine really fun. Matthew's latest favorite is flying to bed on his rocket. This consists of Brian carrying Matthew on his Radio Flyer Rocket to bed. Recently a new option was added. I call this one the Blankie-Burrito Sling. Brian wraps Matthew in his blankies and carries him to bed like a burrito sling. There is enough handle with the blankets to swing Matthew around and make him laugh hysterically. Of course, I tense up during both of these bedtime games, as they both carry the potential for banged heads, severe dizziness and at worst, broken bones resulting from falls from great heights.

Well, the other night, Matthew insisted on going to bed in the Blankie-Burrito Sling. He laid out his blankets and then sprawled out on top of them so that Brian could wrap him up. Brian did, and then proceeded to make the the Blankie-Burrito Sling adventure ride last as long as possible. First, he spun Matthew around a couple of times. Matthew giggled. Then, Brian landed the sling on the kitchen table, "Is this your bed?"

"No," answered Matthew, his giggles increasing in intensity.

Brian swung him a couple more times. Matthew by now was gasping from laughing so hard. Then they disappeared and I figured the game was over. Suddenly, I heard a queer splashing sound. My immediate thought was that Matthew had gotten a little too much spinning and thrown up. But then Brian bellowed, "Why is there water in the bathtub?"

I ran to the bathroom to see Matthew and his blankets on the floor, soaking wet. It turns out that I had neglected to drain the bathwater after giving Matthew his bath. Brian continuing the fun of the Blankie-Burrito sling had gone into the dark bathroom to put Matthew in the bathtub intending to ask, "Is this your bed?" Needless to say, they were both more than a little surprised when Matthew got dunked in cold bathwater.

In the end, all was well. Matthew's stunned look disappeared within a minute or two and the clothes dryer worked wonders on the sopping blankies. Brian was mad at me for about as long as the blankets took to dry, but he eventually saw the humor in the event.

My funny boy

Matthew cracks me up. Here are a few examples of ways that Matt keeps me amused.

A couple of days ago he developed an attachment to a black and white Beanie Baby puppy. He has had it since birth and never paid it any attention, but something drastic changed. He now says the word puppy, so that may be part of the shift in interest, but "puppy" now goes everywhere. Today, puppy had to have a coat on to go outside (I finally found a good use for that black and white polka dot scarf), had to brush his teeth, eat crackers, get and give mommy kisses and particpate in every other activity. Fortunately for me if Matthew refuses to do something, if I ask puppy to do it, puppy (via Matthew) will do it. Tonight after reading stories and scriptures I asked Matthew whose turn it was to say the prayer. He pointed to puppy and said, "Uh, puppy" and then proceeded to fold puppy's front paws.

Matthew has also started attempting more words--finally! He still refuses to try words that are more than one or two syllables, but its a definite indication that the talking idea is growing on him. Yesterday at dinner prayer he pointed at himself to say the prayer. Brian said each sentence then paused for Matthew to repeat. Matthew edited each sentence to "ah". So the prayer sounded something like this:
Brian: Our dear Heavenly Father.
Matthew: Ah
Brian: We thank thee for this day.
Matthew: Ah
Brian: We thank thee for the food.
Matthew: Ah
...and so on.

Tonight while reading scriptures Matthew insisted on following along in his own book. I noticed that he kept saying "ah" at regular intervals and I finally realized that he was repeating what I was saying in his own abbreviated way. It sounded something like this:

Emilie: And it came to pass
Matthew: Ah
Emilie: that I Nephi
Matthew: Ah, ah

etc. . .

And finally, his interest in utensils. Recently, Matt has developed an interest in kitchen utensils (not to mention tools in the toolbox). He now gets out the salad tongs and uses them to pick up anything and everything he can find. He also gets his own silverware for meals (which is great), but the other night he insisted on eating with a large spaghetti spoon. It was quite amusing, especially since he was actually eating spaghetti.

I love being a mom.

Dancing and Tumbling

Matthew has so much fun dancing and I have a lot of fun watching him. He has developed this new kind of dance movement, I can't describe it. You know the baby-bop type dancing, where all the movement seems to originate from the abdomen? Well, he used to move like that but his dancing has evolved into a head and shoulder style that looks pretty funny. He even tries to add footwork, and is actually getting better. Little Gym is probably the best place to see his gross motor skills at work. His jumping and side galloping is getting quite good. Last week, while I did a workout video, Matthew did a great grapevine. He is still working on using the upper and lower half of the body at the same time, but I figure that he still has time before he cares about looking cool at dances.